Saturday, March 31, 2012

Marked Woman, or How I Ruined Raggedy Ann...

Priced to Sell!

Recently, we held a very successful household tag sale. Most of the time I try to lead the sellers to the auction route, in this case we determined that the most effective means would be having a tag sale. It was a lot of work but the payoff was worth it. Over the course of 3 days we sold over 90% of the items in the house, but it was not without incident.

Chastised, threatened, humiliated over a $1.00 figurine. I made the fateful error of using an erasable marker on a Raggedy Ann figurine. I was unaware at the time of marking this item that the removable marker could not be removed. It seems that removable markers, while not permanent, become permanent when not used properly. Bisque figurines apparently constitute improper use. Raggedy Ann was bisque.

Enter in one of our tag sale patron's, who we will simply call that Whiny B*#ch.

Whiny B*#ch was very upset because of my inappropriate use of an "erasable" marker. I tried explaining that although unfortunate we would make every attempt to remove the now unremovable markings from the front of the doll. Whiny B*#ch followed Stephanie (my wife) from room to room while she looked for anything that might lead to the restoring Raggedy Ann to her original pristine condition. It was to no avail. Raggedy's pristine appearance, just like her lost virginity could never be returned. Water, soap and scrubbies did not work. We even tried contacting the erasable marker company, their response almost equaled the Whiny B*#ch's, "They were meant for use on dry erase boards only!". Oops.

Whiny B*#ch left in complete and utter disgust. She was last seen slamming her car door shut while nervously lighting a cigarette. She sped off wheels squealing in an apparent display of disgust.

Embarrassed and not knowing what to do, I purchased the figurine myself. I plan on carrying her with me everywhere with me to remind me that not all markers are created equally. I'm now a dollar poorer, and I will forever be reminded of the day that I took a clean ceramic dolls beautiful finish and ruined it. I will spend the rest of my days taking care of her, with the hope, that someday we will be able to unring the bell.

Meeting Gus!

Favorite Movie TARZAN

Smelling the Roses

1 comment:

  1. hahaha Poor Raggedy! Naturally she'll be welcomed into our family with open arms. I always wanted a 6" tall bisque sister.